It's Cocktail Time

Anna Lindow live from New York City

The Email I Sent to Groupon That Explains How I’ve Been Feeling for Awhile

hi nicole,

i guess we’d like a refund, but what i really want is cleaning services. 
is there another groupon provider you can put us in touch with ? maybe someone who does a deal through groupon NOW ? in an ideal world, you guys would connect us with a different groupon provider, keep the money we have already paid, and give us a credit for 12 cleaning services, and cover whatever the difference in cost may be between the original groupon we bought and 12 cleaning service appointments with the new provider. 
i understand groupon is the middle man, but customers also rely on you to provide services we can count on. if i can’t count on the services actually being delivered, i can’t shop with groupon. because i’d rather pay full price for a service i can be confident will meet my needs than pay half and roll the dice.
i think the groupon promise should be that if customers have a negative experience redeeming a groupon, you offer to refund OR to find another provider in your massive network that can help wherever possible, and you cover the difference in cost. because simply saying, oops, we worked with providers that are shady and don’t deliver on their promises so we’ll refund your money doesn’t actually solve my problem. my apartment still needs cleaning.
i’d like to believe in groupon. but when i buy a manicure, and the place refuses to redeem it on a weekend even though that wasn’t in the fine print, or when the hair salon i bought a cut from is mysteriously booked for months and at all the desirable times (“oh…you have the GROUPON”), and when the cleaning service vanishes into thin air, i become skeptical.
please let me know what groupon is doing to make sure merchants live up to their end of the bargain. when groupon features a merchant, you are both implicitly and explicitly endorsing them. so when the merchant lets me down, you do too. 
thanks,
anna

On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 5:28 PM, Groupon Support <support@groupon.com> wrote:
## Reply above this line ##

Hi Anna, 

I’m so sorry to hear about this! Typically I would offer to reach out to the merchant to see if we can get you scheduled, but it appears that this business has been unresponsive with us as well. 

This is never the experience we want customers to have redeeming Groupons. I want to let you know that you are covered by the Groupon Promise: if you ever have a negative experience redeeming a Groupon, we are happy to cancel your order and issue you a full refund. 

Let me know if you would like to be refunded. As this is in your father’s account, the refund would have to go to him, and I would be happy to follow up with him regarding this if this is what you choose. 

Let me know how you’d like to proceed. 

Regards, 

Nicole V. 
support@groupon.com 


——

hello, 

see below. 
i have left 2 voicemails with this housecleaning service to redeem my gift. neither message was returned.
i called the number this morning again and it was disconnected.
i was really excited to use this gift. this is the third services groupon i’ve gotten where there was a problem with scheduling the service, but this is by far the most egregious.
please let me know ASAP how we can make this right.
best,
anna
Feel free to repurpose this handy coffeemaking decision tree if you feel you are often coming upon a nearly empty pot

Feel free to repurpose this handy coffeemaking decision tree if you feel you are often coming upon a nearly empty pot

Things That Bother Me: It’s Almost Winter Edition

the feeling of just the toes of your socks being wet after you walk to work meaning that there will be no point during the day at which your feet feel completely dry



those gloves that allow you to be able to type on your phone while wearing them, but only because i find myself sort of wanting to buy them



any type of merchandise that involves a play on words/sexual pun utilizing “ho ho ho”



the inevitable fact that after christmas, banana republic or some similar store will still play christmas music, which is an extremely depressing soundtrack for browsing the “take an additional 30% off” rack of holiday dressy tops that are a little sexy but also could go under a suit if you really had to transition seamlessly from day to night



that song that starts “said i’m gonna buy these shoeeeees…”



egg nog: i still don’t like it or any derivative thereof and also what is nog

the feeling of dramatic tension when keira knightley’s character in love actually realizes her husband’s best friend is in love with her, wow isn’t that so awkward every time? but we’re supposed to be touched? but also it’s like, dude, don’t bring a boombox and posterboards meant to declare your love to your friend’s wife!

when you’re wrapping a gift and you think you have allotted enough paper, but when you get to the last corner, you realize there’s like 4 centimeters that aren’t going to be covered, so you have to start over again

mikedang:

bundlehq:

Looks like the South and Midwest love fast food joints the most. Large coastal cities tend to spend less than the national average on fast food.

New Yorkers spend 48 percent less than the national average on fast food. Good! There are so many other cheap eats in NYC that popping into a McDonald’s doesn’t makes sense to me. Plus, you know, the gross out factor of fast food chains.

mikedang:

bundlehq:

Looks like the South and Midwest love fast food joints the most. Large coastal cities tend to spend less than the national average on fast food.

New Yorkers spend 48 percent less than the national average on fast food. Good! There are so many other cheap eats in NYC that popping into a McDonald’s doesn’t makes sense to me. Plus, you know, the gross out factor of fast food chains.

You are not trying to convince this VC that you’re worth investing in.
You are trying to learn from people who have seen tens of thousands of patterns of success and failure.


You are not trying to get that job.
You are trying to figure out whether or not you and the job are a good match.


You are not trying to win over that other person’s heart.
You are trying to figure out if this is the kind of person you can face the unknown and unwritten future with.


You are not trying to sell this customer.
You are trying to understand them better.


You are not trying to recruit this developer.
You are trying to figure out if they are a good match for your firm, and you are a good match for their goals.


Change your perspective.

Charlie O’Donnell